Aloha,

Thanks to the folks over at the Zombie Research Society word is spreading about the zombie threat and this month is Zombie Awareness Month so take a moment to ask your friends if they are prepared. And be sure to let them know the threat is real and already here, not coming soon.

Since the warmer weather in the spring makes zombies more mobile the F.O.M. Test Labs Zombie Suppression Unit is out in the field working off their winter weight gain and using up some ammunition that is almost expired.

So, remember, stay alert! If you see a road sign that says "Caution! Zombies Ahead!!!" do not pick up hitchhikers! Rolling up the car windows is a good idea too.

Keep the torches burning (and your powder dry),

—Tagata Maiori Rogorogo